Day 29 of 59 Days: "Blessing in Plain Sight"
Day 29: “Blessing in Plain Sight”
May 19 and 20, 2019
Original Painting: “Brigid’s Blessing to be Visible,” Acrylic on Canvas, 11×14 in gold frame, 12/28/2017
When I painted “Brigid’s Blessings to be Visible,” I hadn’t planned my trip to Ireland…yet! I was playing with new paints that were a Christmas gift from my son. I was just playing, or so I thought. I placed color on the canvas with a brush, then covered it in black and pulled it off. I remember, I kept turning the canvas. I am not sure when I added the St. Brigid’s Cross or named the painting. It was again, just playing, or so I thought!
Tradition and ritual of a St. Brigid’s cross is to place it over the door or threshold as a blessings and protection of all that dwell inside. The crosses are usually made from reeds, woven by bending and turning. It takes dexterity, patience and has a quieting rhythm. There are many styles of this cross that come under the name of St. Brigid. Mine are created from an old canvas that I didn’t know what to do with. The cutting of the canvas, the turning to place the strips in the pattern, the pausing, created a rhythm for me and an unwinding.
This blog has taken two day to come to the page. I imposed pressure on myself with a dash of shame, yesterday, to get it done. I finally came to the answer to a question my son asked me earlier in the week. He asked, “who is my writing for? Who is my art for?” What great questions! They are for me, first and foremost. So, here is what I needed to know or remember before writing more about this painting…
I am at a crossroads, a juncture in my life. I was dramatically changed from my experiences on my pilgrimage. I was changing as I prepared for this trip. I have been changing all my life, though the changes were very small. Was it really change or was it more of a becoming? I am becoming who I am remembering myself to be. I am waking up and I need to awaken more. This juncture is a coming together of many lifetimes of stories that are wanting to be told. This juncture is about finding where my heart resides and the treasure that will be there.
A friend said yesterday, that I am doing too much. That I am over-extended and in need of rest. This isn’t the first time I have heard this or even said this to myself. The tiredness and fatigue I feel is not from work that is always satisfying. I want my end of day fatigue to come from my heart being full of the joys of living a natural life of integrity and purpose. I have hidden my colors under the black paint for too long. I have helped others show their colors and thought that mine had to be hidden. I have allowed myself to be disenchanted with life, while encouraging others to be enchanted.
Driving home from the grocery store yesterday morning, I had the thought that life can be mystical and mundane at the same time. It is not an either-or scenario. It is my life to choose to see the mystical and interpret it as more than mundane. I can find the divine messages strolling the isles of Aldis and in the slow-paced walking in the woods. I can breathe life into an experience pumping gas and weaving a cross. It is my choice to bring meaning to life. My colorfulness is more than words in a blog, paint on a canvas or a conversation with a friend. It is my soul’s longing to live my life out loud. At some point, I don’t know when…I agreed to be shushed and it was me doing the shushing. Ouch!
The cross is a symbol of sacrifice to many. For me it is not about sacrifice, not this one. This is a reminder to wake up, to accept where I am at this moment, at this juncture and choose what is next…FOR ME. My creativity is mine to create and share, if I wish. I don’t need approval to know, that this process of blogging for 59 days is changing me. It is creating the life I want. It has caused me to let go of thoughts, practices, processes and even rules. It has changed relationships. This cross has reminded me to bless my own hearth…my heart. The fire that is my lifeblood. It empowers and evokes my spirit to soar like a falcon, eagle or phoenix. It is with passion and purpose that I am choosing to continue. I am grateful and blessed. Thank you, Brigid!
Blessings and peace on the journey!
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